I decided that if I was now going to actually be living in the United States with my new adopted parents, I would be well served to try to assimilate to the American way of life as much as possible. I had to study them... so I could become them. So I rolled to the mall.
So I'm cruising the place, you know, doing up the whole goo goo ga ga schtick... when suddenly I hear a very loud lady screaming from behind me. 
That's no lady! That's Tia Lovey and her kids kidnapping me.
Mathias is president of the Miami chapter of the Young Republicans Club.
And Mia is not camera shy at all.
Easy does it kids... I'm used to my Daddy's pace. Try and see if you can walk like an exhausted 41 year old man that's in way over his head.
It was a total lucky fluke running into the Lovey clan. They were doing a little shopping and then Mathias had a little business to take care of involving a serving of chocolate yogurt with some gummy bears. I know I just met this kid but I gotta tell you... I like his style.
Look Clown... stop following me and stop offering me balloon animals. I don't know what you're talking about, I'm not from here and you're starting to creep me out.
Women dig me becsause I rarely wear underwear and when I do it's usually something outrageous.
Look cat. Just so you know. I run this territory now. If you want to continue to hang around in this area you will have to pay. My price is a peach juice box a day. Got it?
Oh hi Mommy! I didn't see you standing there. I was just petting Lola. Isn't she beautiful?
Don't hate me because I'm beautiful.
Did you see the tail? Not everyone can pull off this look.
Good Morning! Does this hurt?
It was one of those weekends.
