Monday, August 16, 2010

Weekend Warrior

When you adopt a set of parents and then move into their home, inevitably you will begin to adapt to their rythm of everyday life. You will start waking up when they wake up... you will start eating when they eat... and as in my case, you begin eating what they're eating.

This weekend was a big one for me... more specifically, for my stomach. On Friday nite Daddy took Mommy, Abuelita and me out to dinner to an Italian restaurant. I ate some of Mommy's risotto... some bread... and some Lentle soup. I was nervous about the soup because I didn't know what it was... until I saw it. Lentle soup? In my country that very same dish is called: a bowl of beans... but whatever. On saturday afternoon I got to try my very first milkshake with Daddy and Tio Yared and on Sunday I sat on Daddy's lap while he and Mommy had Cheeseburgers at a water-side sports bar and grill and I ate his tomato slice, 4 french fries and Mommy's lettuce. They kept me hopping all weekend long. I got to go to a park and play on a swing set for the very first time... I got to go to my favorite mall for an afternoon ride in my blue car... and I went swimming in the Atlantic Ocean for the first time.

Funny story about Daddy and Abuelita. On friday I had 2 doctor's appointments. The first one was at 7:45 AM and the second one was at 11 AM. Daddy declared it a guys-only morning hang so Abuelita stayed home and Mommy went off to work. We were done with the first appointment by 9 AM and Daddy decides that we are going to have to go all the way home before heading off to our second appointment at 11. Why?... So he could go to the bathroom. Understand this about my Daddy. He is crazy when it comes to this topic. He will not use a public bathroom. Never, ever... ever! He'd rather hold it in for 3 days and get sick like he did one time when he was a kid and on a camping trip. Mommy says that he once rented a hotel room when they were on a long road trip together just so he could have his own private bathroom.

So Daddy and I get home and Abuelita asks what we're doing there? Daddy... lies and tells her that he forgot some papers that he needed for the 11 o'clock appointment. He's embarrassed and doesn't want Abuelita to know that he's dying to go to the bathroom. Once again... Daddy's crazy and strange things embarrass him. Things like his mother-in-law knowing that he poops just like every other human being on the planet. So he tries to throw her off the scent by hanging around downstairs for about 5 minutes doing little things in the living room... finally, when hears Abuelita reading to me in the kitchen, he dashes upstairs to the master bedroom where he can go to the bathroom in peace and away from prying ears.

He closed 3 doors and put 5 walls between himself and us. He was trying to be as careful as possible so that we wouldn't be able to hear anything that was going on in that master bathroom. In the end... let's just say that Daddy was thankful that he had worked so hard to put so much sound insulation between us. After it's all over, he rushes back downstairs to re-join us and act as if he never went upstairs at all. When he enters the kitchen Abuelita has a little smirk on her face. Was it really a smirk or was Daddy just being paranoid?... it was then that Daddy heard the faulty shower head dripping upstairs in the master bedroom.

And how was he able to hear the drip so clearly, you ask? Through the baby monitor that was now in the master bedroom since I moved in there with Mommy and Daddy 2 days ago. Abuelita is now sleeping in my room and I sleep in a play pen in the master bedroom. So Mommy moved the baby monitor from my room to the master bedroom for when I take my naps and she's downstairs. I guess she forgot to tell Daddy. That monitor picks up every little sound in that room and transmits it to speakers that Mommy has planted all over the house... including the kitchen. Daddy just stared at that baby monitor speaker on the kitchen counter and listened to that shower dripping loudly and clearly.... Abuelita just kept right on smiling to herself. No one said a word for 40 minutes.


The Boy of Steel flies over Metropolis and searches for criminals... or a really good Colombian restaurant. Whichever comes first.

Look... I'm just saying there are a lot of similarities between us. We're both orphans... from another world... we both like brunettes... we both look great in the costume...

All alone... Esteban Joel, amazing explorer, will climb the tree to see what he can find... alone.

Uh... very funny Mommy, but you're kind of ruining the whole mood of my performance.

Esteban Joel... swinger.

Mommy's a swinger too! Daddy is going to be so proud.

Mommy says that if I turn this wheel It'll wake up the Boogie Man... She's joking right?

I'm not mad at you Abuelita... I understand that your back hurts today... All I'm saying is that the whole see-saw experience seems to lack something when the other person is standing next to you instead of sitting across from you, that's all.