Monday, October 18, 2010

Money Shot

History is full of famous, one of a kind, intriguing photos. Photos that boggle the mind and tickle the imagination. Photos that have withstood the test of time. Photos that will forever symbolize right place... right time... right moment.

The one thing that these famous photos have in common is that the photographers that snapped the shots were surely there to photograph something else. I mean, no one takes a camera into the woods with the actual intention of snapping a photo of some Chewbaca look-a-like running amongst the trees. The camera was there for something else and then the photographer got lucky when his once-in-a-lifetime shot appeared before him.

Mommy and Daddy have been on a quest lately to get a photo of me. A very specific photo of me showing off a new talent that I have recently aquired. And I have been very reluctant to allow myself to be photographed performing this new talent of mine... I don't know why.

Maybe it's because I feel like once people see me doing what I'm doing in the photo and then they'll expect me to do it all of the time. Maybe I'm not ready for that. Maybe I feel that it's too much pressure.

The thing that I can do now that my parents so desperately want to document is pretty big stuff. I started doing it around 10 days ago. The first time I did it was while Mommy was bathing me. Then I did it at the park with Daddy. Now I do it pretty much every day. I don't do it on command yet. And I don't do it for photos. Soon as I see a camera, I shut it down. I am not a performing monkey!

And then Daddy got lucky.

He happened to be looking at some pictures that he had taken of me earlier in the day from his digital camera when I decided to do a little showing off behind him. He turned around slowly and before I could flop to the ground he snapped off 2 pictures of me doing my secret trick.

So the cat's out of the bag.

I can stand up on my own. It's not walking... but it's not bad either. Funny story about the first time I stood up for Daddy. We were at the park on a saturday afternoon hanging out when he begins digging through my diaper bag for a toy. When he looks back up at me... I'm standing there on the grass all by myself. It must have taken him by surprise because he just stood there staring at me for about 30 seconds. He's standing there trying to register what he is seeing and trying to make sense of the whole thing. Meanwhile... I'm just standing there looking around being all nonchelant about the whole thing.

Daddy finally moves towards me and I quickly plop to the ground. He spent the next 90 minutes desperately trying to get me to stand up again for the camera. Naturally, I refused. He calls Mommy on the phone to tell her the big news. Get it on film! She yells through the phone. It's not official till then.

So Daddy goes back to trying to get me to stand up again for 20 more minutes. Naturally, he fails. Finally he gives up and goes back into the diaper bag for the car keys. When he looks up... I'm up again. Daddy freezes again. We stand there looking at each other for 2 minutes. Daddy's eyes move towards the digital camera that is sitting neatly on top of his baseball cap on the grass.

A 10 year old boy has stopped by and joined our merry little stand off and is now standing there staring at Daddy, as Daddy stares at me, while I stare at the little boy. Without taking his eyes off of me for a second, Daddy says to the little boy: Take... the picture. The little boy stares back at Daddy confused. Daddy repeats; Take... the picture.

Incredibly, the little boy seemed to understand. He reached over... grabbed the digital camera... turned it on.... pointed... aimed... and took a great picture of Daddy.

I plopped down to the ground just as Daddy was falling to his knees with laughter. He laughed all the way home and then could barely get through the telling of the story to Mommy later that evening. He didn't get the photo he wanted that day but he got something a whole lot better. He got a great story.

Woah woah woah. You're saying that the grass grows back after you cut it? So it's alive? Okay... this is the type of information that I would appreciate getting BEFORE I COME OUT TO A HUGE GRASSY FIELD BAREFOOT!

Esteban Joel, amazing boy robot after being without of food and water for over 3 days on a strange baren planet attempts to eat his own face.

Yeah, you're about a quart low lady. You want me to check the air pressure on the tires?

What do you mean they're made of solid plastic?

Last week I hid Daddy's wallet behind the DVD player. It took him 2 days to find it. That was a lot of fun. This week... I'm thinking toilet.

15 month old boy with sporty blue car seeks fun loving adventurous girl to play with. Must be a non-walker and talker like myself and her hobbies must include napping and pooping.

With my acute sense of hearing I can tell you that there is a huge vehicle approaching the house from the west side. Either that or the TV is on upstairs.

Stupid porcupine! I'll destroy you with my robot kung fu grip action.

Got Chocolate Milk?